4 Skills to Deal with Negativity in the Workplace

Posted by ContributorcloseAuthor: Contributor Name: Staff Contributor
Email: sarablueintl@gmail.com
Site: http://www.redmoonsolutions.com
About: See Authors Posts (4) on Feb 9, 2011 | 0 comments

The last thing we really need in our lives is negative or self-absorbed coworkers affecting how we feel while we’re busy in the office. Whether it’s an individual who is relentlessly negative and constantly tries to bring everyone down – or the person who does not take the time to listen to anyone else’s ideas (but their own), negativity in the workplace can be a major challenge affecting workplace performance. More importantly, it can affect your overall peace of mind – and none of us want to bring our workplace trials home with us, right?

Here are 4 skills that we’ve found help us deal with negative people – and ultimately come out smiling in the end.

#1) Stay Calm and Avoid Personalizing
Chronically negative people are negative to everyone – not just you! Tell yourself this repeatedly if you are in a conversation with a negative person and suddenly feel offended. When you feel offended, your body’s natural reaction is to go into fight-or-flight mode. Blood pressure rises, you speak faster, and it can be very hard to stay focused without losing your cool. Remember to stay calm and breathe slower than normal. Try your best to listen to the negative individual and provide constructive feedback. It’s easier said than done of course, but staying calm is still a personal choice that we all have control over.

#2) Avoid “You” Messages
Have you ever reacted to the following statements:

• I can’t believe you did that.
• What is wrong with you?
• You just messed up that contract.

Just reading through that can make anyone feel uncomfortable. Imagine how those statements affect an individual who is chronically negative. Provide constructive statements using “I” instead of you.”
For example:

• I typically double-check my contracts and have a coworker review it – it really helps to ensure that mistakes are not made.

That statement feels and reads much better, right? This is just one of the ways you can help minimize stress and anxiety amongst coworkers.

#3) Change the Scene!
A simple change of scene can act as a pressure valve and help you reconnect with the positive. Take a brief step outside the office and breathe! Often times, when you are in direct contact with negative energy for too long, you begin to feel overwhelmed.

#4) Focus on Positive Reactions
Remember that you have the ability to influence the feelings and emotions of those around you. When someone attempts to lead you down their negative path by complaining, gossiping or criticizing others – you have a choice to make. It’s easy to go along with it, however – then you have chosen to carry that person’s stress and anxiety on your shoulders. It’s not like you need more weight to bear! When confronted with a negative statement like, “That will never work.” Respond with something positive such as, “What are some constructive ideas that you have to make it work?” or “Let’s work together to consider new ways of making it work!” Instead of falling prey to negativity – you have chosen the constructive path which leads to results and productivity. To learn more about setting a positive example, read Builders vs. Destroyers, a great post that explains a few crucial skills that successful (and positive) people live by.

Viktor Frankl, holocaust survivor and author of “Man’s Search for Meaning” once wrote…

Everything can be taken from a man except the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

No matter what the circumstance may be – we have the ability to choose our reaction.

Now that being said – we want to hear your stories! Have you ever dealt with a coworker who tried to bring everyone else down? We know that there are several different types of negative coworker characters – the narcissist, the non-listener, the big-ego guy… did I miss any?

Share your stories of workplace woes – we’d love to hear them. Next week, we’ll feature a few of your stories right here on Red Whine Wednesday! You can comment below or email us directly.